It’s taken me a moment to gather my thoughts on what I’m about to post. I’m still not entirely sure how to feel, other than extremely saddened and helpless, and partially responsible.
Last week I was working back in hospital at work and we were swamped with little dogs! Don’t get me wrong, I like being kept on my toes and that day was no different! One of the little girls who had just been spayed was having a hard time warming up, which is a notorious little dog problem after surgery. She was screaming in the surgery suite while in the bair hugger and coincidentally was evicted into my care. She immediately stopped when I picked her up and stayed quiet in my care. I kept her wrapped in several blankets and she slowly started warming up.
If only all of them were that easy!
Another dog in my care was a rather scared and subsequently aggressive chihuahua mix. I was unable to get TPR to check on her recovery since she would charge and try to bite whenever the cage door was opened, so I would monitor from afar and she remained alert the rest of the day. Thinking nothing of it, I advised her mom on aftercare and what to watch for when she got home. I was unable to get her from the cage and got help from another tech, then brought her up to her mom and they left together.
After that, the rest of my day was easy and I was just glad that everyone went home with no problems.
… And then I found out I was wrong.
I was informed by my supervisor this past Monday that the dog who wanted to bite everybody passed away that night. Her owner called to inform us that she was really lethargic that night and after getting her to eat and take her pain meds, she still hadn’t perked up. The owner checked on her at midnight to no change and then awoke to find her unresponsive.
I feel like there was more that I could do though. Like there was something I could have done to make the outcome better.
Instead, I have to take this as a learning experience and better myself. Give myself a stronger constitution and not let things get to me this hard if I plan to survive in this field.
One day at a time.